The solution:
Code:
our $debug_ascii_in = 1; # True to assume tcpdump is in ASCII
(Line 55 of the extract-rtmp-flv perl script) Change it to 0, and it works with pcaps. That is, of course, any of them.
How that would've required posting the pcap and the page url is still beyond me.
Again, I don't care about rules, nor did I break any of the ones you stated. If you can't think for yourself and need other people to tell you what's right or wrong, that's a bummer.